The Dominatrix and Partner Limits

Clear Lines of Domination

A good dominatrix will realize the limits of her partner. She will not allow the situation to get out of hand to the point that the relationship is fractured beyond repair. In fact, she will be so in tune with those limits that they will never be crossed. She will find out the limits of her partner upfront, so she knows and understands her boundaries from the beginning of the relationship.

When giving a physical punishment, the dominatrix should understand what is reasonable. She should not overly punish her submissive. The submissive has placed trust in the hands of her, and she should not abuse that trust. She needs to understand that each submissive person is different, and they all have different limits to what they can take. It is part of having compassion and respect for one’s partner.

Certain implements do not work with some submissives, as those implements fall outside of the limits. One submissive might be able to handle a paddle and a whip, but a cane would be too much. The dominatrix needs to understand that and not force a cane upon the submissive, even during a punishment for a serious offense. If the limits are surpassed, it could cause damage to the relationship.

There are also limits in place for control. Some submissives can give all of the control to the dominatrix while others need to maintain some control in their lives. The dominatrix needs to understand where her partner is at with surrendering control.

In order to properly make sure that limits are enforced, many dominants and submissives use a safe word. Whenever the safe word is spoken by the submissive, the dominant is expected to halt whatever she is doing. This allows for the situation to never get out of control.

Some people do not like to use a safe word because they claim that it makes the situation less real. However, it keeps people from getting hurt, so it is a great idea for relationships, especially new unions when people are still testing the limits of their partner.

It is very important that the dominatrix sits down with her partner and discusses his limits. After a limit has been crossed, it is too late to go back and change it. Therefore, it is necessary to know the limitations of the submissive before a cane is taken out or total control is used.